Almost full moon.

Driving home today, I saw a huge full moon and a thought came to mind.

Years ago I saw a japanese animation called "Millennium Actress". I don't remember much of the story, but one thing that has stuck in mind ever since is the dialogue about "the almost full moon". One of the characters said "I like to look up in the sky on the night before the full moon. You know then that tomorrow it's going to be a full moon. After that, the moon will shrink little by little, and it will be gone." ... Not those exact words, but I think back on it every time I look at the moon.

Hope, I think it's what that character was talking about. It's a luxury and a privilege for one to have hope, no matter how big or small. When a question is yet to be answered, there's always a chance of it being yes, as well as a no. Hope. It is such a wonderful thing.

I just finished reading a script today, as part of my final exam to come up with its marketing plan. The story is about a corrupted man meeting a woman whom everything about her screams goodness. Of course, they fall in love, and, of course, he now wants to become a better man for her. Hope is what he finds in her, a possibility of a better way, a better life, of becoming a better man.

There are so many films talking about hope, shedding lights on it from so many different angles. To have it, to hold on to it, to give up on it or even to imagine it.

My mom said to me, just a week ago when I let slip a tiny bit of disspointment over things not working out, she said "don't expect too much out of people (and the world) or you'll get yourself hurt". For years, with those consoling mantra, I thought she was ripping out my soul and trying to convert me into a cynic. But I guess she was right in a way. Expectation ruins things sometimes. And if you look close enough there's a fine line between expecting and hoping. Until I'm smart enough to distinguish those two, I'd settle for being a romantic cynic for now. If there's such a thing in this world.